Not sure what the formal response is to this one.
How about this tried and trusted method, once told to me by an old codger fishing on the banks of Lake Conroe. I was catching grass carp - big buggers, over 20lb a pop - when this old boy as black as burned wood came strolling along the bank.
'What y'all fishin fer there?' he asked, rubbing the curled grey whiskers on his heavily wrinkled chin.
'Errr, grass carp mate. I'm not keeping them - you can't cook 'em.'
'Suuuure you can cook 'em' he says, his one reminaing front tooth slipping out over ancient gums in a rather scary grin.
'I'll tell ya how t'cook them suckers.
Ya takes yer fish, guts him, cleans him and wraps him in foil.
Then take a big ol' piece o' mesquite wood that's soaked in fresh warder overnight.
Nail that fish t'the wood and place the whole thing inta th' faar.
Let 'im cook fer 'bout a half-hour an turn 'im over.
After a while take the whole thing out. Pull the nails, throw out the fish an eat the wood.'
With that he threw his ancient old head back and howled at the Texas sky, his saggy old dungarees shaking with uncontrolable mirth.
I suggest a similar remedy may be in the offing for the BN Old Boy.
Go easy on the dungarees though. A man of your stature can't be too careful