Plagiarists Corner

[Sweder]

REINA: "I WUZ ROBBED"

Shock news emerged at lunch-time that only one Liverpool player's house was burgled during last night's Big Cup semi-final second leg at Anfield. As the expensively assembled teams of Liverpool and Chelsea put on the kind of football horror show eerily reminiscent of Watford v Wimbledon circa 1988, crafty thieves were stealing jewellery, a home entertainment system and personal documents from the unfortunate Jose Reina's home in Woolton ... south Liverpool, before speeding off in his Porsche Cayenne, which was later found burnt out in West Derby ... north Liverpool.

Of course the Fiver's not about to resort to cheap regional stereotypes and suggest that it was Scousers that were responsible for this heist, especially when it has more important security concerns to write about. To wit: Liverpool chief executive Rick Parry's worry that the possible presence of thousands of drunken, ticketless MU Rowdies and Liverpool fans in Athens on Big Cup final night may result in all sorts of trouble - the least of which will be the ransacking of 22 empty mock Tudor mansions back home.

"When Clive Tyldesley said those Liverpool fans will find a way to get to Athens somehow, do you think he imagined it being in Pepe Reina's Porsche Cayenne?" Ian Rands.

"It's Athens I feel sorry for. Just imagine the scene: loads of Scousers running around the Acropolis shouting 'Call that history?'" Steve Greenwood.


[SIZE="1"]The Fiver, 2nd May 2007[/SIZE]