Spanish joke

[Ana]

This is a brilliant joke. Sorry, but I am not able of translate it, perhaps Antonio or Bierzo Baggie??? In any case, this post is especially for both them. I know that they will love it. Sorry for the rest. Translation is too much complicated and will loose all the sens.

Joke:
La siguiente pregunta fue hecha en un examen trimestral de química en la Universidad de Toledo. La respuesta de uno de los estudiantes fue tan "profunda" que el profesor quiso compartirla con sus colegas, vía Internet, razón por la cual podemos todos disfrutar de ella.

Pregunta:
¿Es el Infierno exotérmico (desprende calor) o endotérmico (lo absorbe)?
La mayoría de estudiantes escribieron sus comentarios sobre la Ley de Boyle (el gas se enfría cuando se expande y se calienta cuando se comprime).
Un estudiante, sin embargo, escribió lo siguiente: Infierno varía con el tiempo. Para ello hemos de saber a qué ritmo entran las almas en el Infierno y a qué ritmo salen. Tengo sin embargo entendido que, una vez dentro del Infierno, las almas ya no salen de él. Por lo tanto, no se producen salidas.

En cuanto a cuántas almas entran, veamos lo que dicen las diferentes religiones. La mayoría de ellas declaran que si no perteneces a ellas, irás al Infierno.

Dado que hay más de una religión que así se expresa y dado que la gente no pertenece a más de una, podemos concluir que todas las almas van al Infierno. Con las tasas de nacimientos y muertes existentes, podemos deducir que el número de almas en el Infierno crece de forma exponencial.

Veamos ahora cómo varía el volumen del Infierno Según la Ley de Boyle, para que la temperatura y la presión del Infierno se mantengan estables, el volumen debe expandirse en proporción a la entrada de almas.

Hay dos posibilidades:
1. Si el Infierno se expande a una velocidad menor que la de entrada de almas, la temperatura y la presión en el Infierno se incrementarán hasta que éste se desintegre.
2. Si el Infierno se expande a una velocidad mayor que la de la entrada de almas, la temperatura y la presión disminuirán hasta que el Infierno se congele.
¿Qué posibilidad es la verdadera?:
Si aceptamos lo que me dijo Teresa en mi primer año de carrera ("hará frío en el Infierno antes de que me acueste contigo"), y teniendo en cuenta que me acosté con ella ayer noche, la posibilidad número 2 es la verdadera. Doy por tanto como cierto que el Infierno es exotérmico y que ya está congelado. El corolario de esta teoría es que, dado que el Infierno ya está congelado, ya no acepta más almas y está, por tanto, extinguido... dejando al Cielo como única prueba de la existencia de un ser divino, lo que explica por qué, anoche, Teresa no paraba de gritar "¡Oh, Dios mío!

Dicho estudiante fue el único que sacó "sobresaliente"

[Sweder]

In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.

[Seafront Plodder]

The following question was done in a quarterly examination of chemistry in the University of Toledo. The answer of one of the students was so "deep" that the professor wanted to share it with his colleagues, via Internet, reason for which we can all enjoy her.

Question: It is exothermic Hell (gives off heat) or endothermic (it absorbs it)? Most of students their commentaries wrote on the Law of Boyle (the gas cools off when it expands and it is warmed up when it is compressed). A student, nevertheless, wrote the following thing: Hell varies with time. For it we have to know what rate enters the souls Hell and what rate leave. I have nevertheless understood that, once within Hell, the souls no longer leave him.

Therefore, exits do not take place. As far as how many souls enter, we see what the different religions say. Most of them they declare that if you do not belong to them, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than a religion than therefore is expressed and since people do not belong to more than one, we can conclude that all the souls go to Hell. With the existing rates of births and deaths, we can deduce that the number of souls in Hell grows of exponential form.

Let us see now how it varies the volume of Hell According to the Law of Boyle, so that the temperature and the pressure of Hell stay stable, the volume must expand in proportion to the entrance of souls.

There are two possibilities: 1. If Hell expands at a speed smaller than the one of entrance of souls, the temperature and the pressure in Hell will be increased until this one is disintegrated. 2. If Hell expands at a speed greater than the one of the entrance of souls, the temperature and the pressure will diminish until Hell is congealed.

What possibility is the true one: If we accepted what Teresa in my first year of race said to me ("it will be cold in Hell before he lays down to me with you"), and considering that I lay down with her night yesterday, the possibility number 2 is the true one. I give therefore like certain that the Hell is exothermic and that already is congealed.

The correlation of this theory is that, since Hell already is congealed, no longer it accepts more souls and it is, therefore, extinguished... leaving to the Sky like only test of the existence of a divine being, which explains why, last night, Teresa did not stop to shout "Oh, God mine! This student was the unique one who removed "substitute"

__________________________________________
Maybe loses a bit in translation but I get the gist.

[Seafront Plodder]

A mosquito cried out in pain:
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of his sorrow
was para-dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane*


[SIZE="1"]*That's DDT to everyone else... [/SIZE]

[Mid Life Crisis Marathon Man]

Oh God, what have we done to deserve this?

[El Gordo]

A mosquito cried out in pain:
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of his sorrow
was para-dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane*


[SIZE="1"]*That's DDT to everyone else... [/SIZE]

One can't help feeling that this needs a spot more polish...