Conspiracy theory 101

[Sweder]

It could, of course, be entirely coincidental, but has anyone else noticed the absence of the Bard? Our Will's been silent ever since MLCman went into Tazmanian exile . . .

(rubs chin, raises eyebrow in a Roger Moore stylee . . .)

[El Gordo]

The extraordinary coincidence hadn't escaped my attention.

I desperately miss old MLCM.

This sentimental longing does not, of course, have anything to do with the Aussies being stuffed daily on cricket pitches the length and breadth of this sceptred isle.

You know what will happen of course. A miracle will eventually happen, and Australia will win a game of cricket. Then he'll suddenly burst forth, crowing like mad.

[Mid Life Crisis Marathon Man]

I remain impressed with Pietersen, but I can't understand why he's playing for your lot when he's clearly a Seff Effriken. Of the rest of the side, the only one who's shown any real spine is Gough. He's like a pommie Merv Hughes - you gotta love him. As for the rest - well they have modest flashes of talent occasionally, but I can't see them winning a test match against us - unless it's a dead rubber. Well maybe one, if they all fire on a dead flat pitch in cold weather and the Aussies have lost at the races and Punter's dog dies or something. But it's not very likely.

By the way, what the hell happened to Caddick? He takes 7 for not-very-many to destroy us in the last test we played against you lot and we never hear of him again! As he's not really English I'm surprised he's not an automatic selection...

And please tell me Hoggard will get a test spot - he's a far better bowler than some of these other plodders you're putting up.

Speaking of which, a special hello to Seafront Plodder - obviously you've seen the light and have converted to cricket if you've read this far ;-)

MCLM

P.S. I'm not the bard.

[Seafront Plodder]

a special hello to Seafront Plodder - obviously you've seen the light and have converted to cricket if you've read this far ;-)

MCLM

P.S. I'm not the bard.

Oh bugger!

and welcome back, you have been missed. Quite surprising for an Aussie.