English Cricket

[Sweder]

Hello sports fans! Hot news from the files of leather and willow; big trouble in little bone china at the Lords Tea Rooms! Just as an Australian team looks to be at its weakest in a quarter of a century our brave blazered boys have taken careful aim and shot themselves in both feet*.

Hoorah! cry the Eton Rifles. Huzzah! scream the FT-weilding, monacled moustaches as the ECB sack the England coach and their blue-eyed Springbok KP (Nuts) resigns the captaincy in one balmy sub-zero afternoon. You couldn't make it up, people; the Sheileroos will be sobbing into their Tooheys on the streets of Wogga Wogga tonight. Trust the poms to light a match when there's a gas leak! They couldn't find their bums with both hands, bless 'em.

Coachless, skipperless, clueless and couldn't-care-less - English cricket rides a new crest of myrth and mayhem this evening. Wither the doubters? For shame, feckless fools, this sport's not dying on it's ass it's just taking a monstrous detour into the celebrity-swill of Big Bother and Strictly Come Bungling. Ah, I remember when Twenty20 referred to hindsight; perfect vision! Bring back Micheal Vaughan! they cried . . . no, not the Barmy Army (even those addled sots can spot a runless no-hoper from the blurry boundary) - the Aussie hacks, plum noses shining in the floodlights, desperate to keep the laughter rolling as the Home of Cricket becomes the Theatre of Devine Comedy.

SP, you gotta get into this game old son; it's a hoot!

_________________
Feckless Hack

[SIZE="1"]* apologies to Tom Fordyce at the Beeb from whom I borrowed that gem[/SIZE]

[Mid Life Crisis Marathon Man]

You couldn't make it up, people; the Sheileroos will be sobbing into their Tooheys on the streets of Wogga Wogga tonight.

That's Wagga Wagga: get it right! :mad:

What a buffoon Skunk is: just as they give him the coach's head on a platter as he demanded, he has a hissy fit and quits! The guy's a prat.

OR: is there something deeper to this? The big rumour doing the rounds here is that Skunk's great mate Shane Warne is set to take on the job as the new England coach . That would be a turn up for the books.

There's another rumour however, that he's also set to come out of retirement for one more Ashes tour. Now that would be something to see! Certainly he looks fresh and fitter than ever, so anything's possible. And regarding both rumours he's only saying "no comment".

After yesterday's astonishing, astonishing last day of the final test against South Africa (and everyone is talking about it here, even the Aussie Seafront Plodders), the Ashes tour is going to be very exciting. Watch out for our new breed of bowlers: Siddle, Bollinger, McDonald, Hilfenhaus and Kresza - all very promising indeed and some great results early on in their test careers: they really did look the goods during this South African series.

Bring it on!

[Sweder]

Hmm, methinks using 'Australia', 'weakest' and 'quarter of a century' in the same sentence may have touched a raw nerve

I stand corrected - Wagga Wagga indeed; for to say it the other way implies a collection of haridon half-breed spear-chuckers lurking in thick scrub. Not the intention here I assure you.

Warnie - you can't keep the big man out of the headlines can you?
I for one would love to see him back, though in the Aussie team as opposed to coaching England. I don't think Sir Bufton Tuffton would stand for having another Johnny Foreigner parked at the top table. That said rumours abound of yet another Springbok taking the reigns . . . personally I'd like to see Capello in the hot seat. No i-pods, no wags and no daft haircuts.

I missed most of the series Down Under but kept tabs on the scores. Sounds like the Proteas stepped up a gear; they certainly handed us a lesson in carving out a result in tough conditions last year. I like the cut of Graham Smith's jib - the man has bottle and character. Arrogant yes, but as any good Aussie'll tell you that's OK so long as you back it up on te field of play.

You listening KP?

[Seafront Plodder]

I've reported this thread to the administrator here, as there appear to be 3 posts above mine, all of which are completely blank, absolutely nothing of any value on them at all.

Must be a software glitch.

[martinfoster]

Yes I may have short of understanding the context in which Rambo's remarks are made. I am sorry about that. But nonetheless whatever be their remarks either from England players, media, ECB or even the readers on this blog in the past, that still does not take away any cricket player in the world to play for money as I was comparing any equivalent sport in Europe or USA/Canada(where I am settled now since many years ) where players of any sport play for money. whosoever made the comment in the past about loyalty could have made out of lack of perspective and if there is an opportunity which they see now to make money, why should it be equated to prostitution?? That belittles the cricket game and I am against that hence my above comment. It is but natural that some English players would have supported ECB backed Stanford trophy games but that does not take away their right to change their view and you cannot call it double standards. Everyone cricket player has a right to exploit any opportunity which was missed by him in the past.
How do we know that 3 years from now IPL will be the best or only tournament and also in the same form as it exists today ? I am also against cricket players banned by BCCI or ICC for playing in the ICL tournament. I am sorry but that is treating cricket players like slaves or bonded labour. Newzealand, Pakistan, Bangladesh are the main teams hurt due to this monoploistic policy against ICL> Cricket is a game and a professional game now unlike in the past and people need to change with the changing times.
I predict "DEMISE OF TEST CRICKET" in few years and so be it if the viewers want to watch and enjoy only ODIs and 20-20. After I left India in 1991, I have seen that in North Amnerica people would dread at the thought of playing or even watching a game for 5 days and have a "DRAW". That was what the reality is . This is why the game was never popular in many countries but the ODIS and 20-20 is drawing interest from countries like China apart from Canada and USA who will also eventually pick up T20 . Why should shorter runs of cricket game be a concern for Englich cricket ??? or anyone for that matter? Why is playing for money being equated to prostitution ? why don't we say the same for any other sport ?