We have lost a comedy genius...

[Seafront Plodder]

Well two actually... I grew up watching Dave Allen. Sitting there on his stool fag in hand, scotch on the table.

RIP. One of my heroes.





But also Kevin Keegan has departed..... May he forever play golf around the courses of the Algarve!

KEVIN KEEGAN: A CAREER IN QUOTES

After several whole seconds' hard thinking, we concluded there was no better way to celebrate the career of a man who once uttered, "Batistuta is very good at pulling off defenders," than by looking at some of his finest oratories. Enjoy...

"People will say that was typical City, which really annoys me. But that's typical City, I suppose..."

"If I had a blank piece of paper there'd be five names on it."

"England have the best fans in the world and Scotland's fans are second to none."

"By the end Asprilla was knackered-o. I think that's the Spanish for it."

"They're the second best team in the world and there's no higher praise than that."

"He's using his strength and that is his strength, his strength."

"You can't do better than go away from home and get a draw."

"The tide is very much in our court now."

"There'll be no siestas in Madrid tonight."

"It's understandable that people are keeping one eye on the pot and another up the chimney."

"In some ways, cramp is worse than having a broken leg."

"It's like a toaster, the ref's shirt pocket. Every time there's a tackle, up pops a yellow card."

"I'd love to be a mole on the wall in the Liverpool dressing room at half-time."

"The game has gone rather scrappy as both sides realise they could win this match or lose it."

"That would have been a goal if it wasn't saved."

And the single defining moment of his career, complete and uncut in all its glory:

"When you do that with footballers, like he said about Leeds... I've kept really quiet, but I'll tell you something, he went down in my estimations when he said that. We have not resorted to that, but I'll tell you, you can tell him now, he'll be watching this, we're still fighting for this title. He's got to go to Middlesbrough and get something. I'll tell you honestly, I would love it if we beat them, love it."

[El Gordo]

My favourite football quote comes from Paul Gascoigne: "I've never made predictions, and I never will".

[El Gordo]

And another few from Keegan:

"They compare Steve McManaman to Steve Highway and he's nothing like him, but I can see why - it's because he's a bit different"


"The good news for Nigeria is that they're two-nil down very early in the game"

"I don't think there's anyone bigger or smaller than Maradona"

[El Gordo]

And from Ron Atkinson:

"Well, Clive, it's all about the two Ms -- Movement and Positioning"

[Nigel]

Keegan as a player - just fantastic.
And Keegan on SuperStars - was even better.
As for Keegan the manager - he so very nearly made it with Newcastle that season, and I for one so wish that he had. They were playing wonderfully attacking football, with some great attacking defenders like Philippe Albert, too.
If only he hadn't bought Asprilla that February....- you know, I think they'd have made it. Great player, but inconsistent and his arrival disrupted the flow of that team.

[Seafront Plodder]

"One of his strengths is not heading."

"He can't speak Turkey, but you can tell he's delighted."

"England can end the millennium as it started - as the greatest football nation in the world."

"They compare Steve McManaman to Steve Heighway and he's nothing like him, but I can see why - it's because he's a bit different."

"Despite his white boots, he has real pace..."

"That would have been a goal if it wasn't saved."

"Goalkeepers aren't born today until they're in their late 20s or 30s."

"The substitute is about to come on - he's a player who was left out of the starting line-up today."

"The ref was vertically 15 yards away."
There are two schools of thought on the way the rest of this half is going to develop; everybody's got their own opinion..."

"The game has gone rather scrappy as both sides realise they could win this match or lose it."

"I'm not disappointed - just disappointed."

"A tremendous strike which hit the defender full on the arm - and it nearly came off."

"The good news for Nigeria is that they're two-nil down very early in the game."

"That decision, for me, was almost certainly definitely wrong."

[Sweder]

Whichever God you believe in, may he go with you.
Can't agree more with SP, an almost forgotten genius in this PC-mad world.

As for Keegan, quell surprise to see him reach for the parachute early.
A very good player in his day, but a man adrift in the ravaged oceans of football management. Anyone daft enough to spend money on Steve MacMananam deserves his P45.

Pip pip!

____________________________
Sweder, Colonial Hasher